Bachelor Party Planning Checklist: 12 Steps to Plan the Stag or Hen Do

The bachelor party should be something special, yet many people feel swamped by the planning at first. It’s unclear who is coming, what you should do and where you will even celebrate. The result is often chaos and a mediocre stag or hen do.

Our checklist takes you through the complete planning in 12 steps, from the first date poll to the follow-up. Work through it in order and you won’t forget anything important.

Summary

• Start planning the bachelor party at least 3 months in advance
• The best man or maid of honour takes charge, together with the closest friends
• The most important questions are: who is coming, when is the stag or hen do, and what are you doing?
• Our checklist guides you through every step you need

1. Who actually plans the bachelor party? (3 months before)

Normally the best man or maid of honour takes on the planning of the stag or hen do. We have gathered everything else that comes with the best man’s duties separately. If for some reason there is no best man, the best friend steps in.

• He or she should also be “boss” of the planning, because at some point decisions have to be made.
• The planning can also be done together by the group of best friends. But you should be clear about who looks after what, and by when (activities, party, getting there and so on), and not have too many friends planning, or it gets chaotic.
• Should the groom or bride be involved? We say NO. It should be a surprise, and the friends can judge perfectly well what he or she would like.
• On the other hand, for most people it comes as no surprise that their best friends are planning the stag or hen do. If he or she knows about it, you can get feedback on the date, activities, guest list and so on. That does have its advantages, but you can plan well without any input too. If you are very unsure, bring them in.

Tip: The best man or maid of honour plans and brings in other friends. The bachelor party is planned as a surprise.

2. Ground rules for a great bachelor party!

• The groom or bride is at the centre of it all. That means it’s not about humiliating them, but about having a brilliant time together! You’ll still have lots of fun and can plan in the odd prank.
• Costs should stay reasonable. After all, the wedding, wedding presents and so on are still to come. If the stag or hen do also comes with a hefty bill, that’s not easy for everyone to cope with.
• “I don’t want anything special” is something you often hear from the bride. Yet it often turns into a disappointment when you then do nothing special. If you know she wants a relaxed evening, make it a special relaxed evening (with a few activities, fancy dress, good food, a spa and so on). Even everyday things can be made special.
• Do something special! Simply going to the same pub as every other weekend isn’t very exciting and certainly won’t stick in your memory as a special event. So plan something out of the ordinary.
• You set the programme: Don’t let any clowns or supposed “bachelor party experts” tell you what you have to do. Everyone has different tastes: some just want to get out into nature, others want a VIP party, others a craft workshop. It’s all fine, it’s your thing! We have been in the stag and hen business for more than 10 years, we have seen it all, and everyone enjoys something different.
• Create memories: With photos, photo books or a photo shoot you can capture the day. That way you’ll still look back on it 10 years later.

Tip: Organise a bachelor or bachelorette party that the bride or groom will genuinely love, 100% the way you imagine it, away from your usual routine. Capture the memories.

3. Settle the basic questions

Even if you don’t necessarily need ages of lead time, it’s better to plan early than late. It makes finding a good date easier, it tends to be cheaper and you simply have more time for planning. First, settle these points:

• Who plans the stag or hen do? We touched on that above…
• Who gets invited?
  • Invite the best friends from the group.
  • The best old friends from school days shouldn’t be missing either.
  • Think of the groom’s or bride’s brothers and sisters too.
  • There should be at least 2, better a handful of friends, but no more than around 12-15, otherwise some activities get difficult.
• Where will you celebrate? That depends a bit on the planned length (one evening or a weekend), your budget and the planned activities.
  • Big city: Party, pub crawl and a strip show? Then you’re better off in a big city, ideally the nearest one.
  • Pricey highlight: If the budget doesn’t matter so much, it can be a trip to Las Vegas or a European capital. A weekend in Mallorca or on another island is nice too, but expensive.
  • Day trip: Cheap but still lovely is an outing in the local area, to a town or into nature.
  • Remote cabin: A remote cabin and your best friends are a very special and private set-up. You have the place to yourselves, also not a bad option.
• When is the stag or hen do?
  • Ideally a few weeks before the wedding, as a rule of thumb 2-4 weeks before. It’s not a good idea to put it too close to the wedding.
  • Check roughly whether there’s a big trade fair or a local festival in the area on the possible weekends. That makes hotels expensive (or fully booked!).
• What will you do? We cover that a little further down…

Also take a look at our FAQ, where we go into each topic in more detail.

Tip: The bachelor party takes place 2-4 weeks before, the best friends come, and the place depends on the budget and what you like.

4. Bring the partner in

For the couple’s partners it’s no surprise that a stag or hen do is being planned. Involving them in the planning makes a lot of sense.

• Get in touch with him or her (without the groom or bride noticing).
• Ask which dates are possible and not already taken by other plans, because free weekends are often rare before a wedding.
• Take those dates into the planning and agree them with the friends (more on that later).
• The partners come into play again later to help set up a surprise.
• PS: If the partner is known for being jealous and causing drama… Tell him or her that a stag or hen do is completely normal and part of the deal. It’s a “farewell” with the best friends (and not about the future spouse). So keep calm, reassure them that you won’t overdo it, and mostly stick to that ;-)!

Tip: The partners help with finding a date and with the surprise.

5. Set a budget limit

Which costs are fine for a stag or hen do depends very much on individual circumstances. In some circles €50 is the planning budget, in others €500.

• Remember that the costs for the groom or bride are normally covered by the guests and come on top.
• A party in another city brings travel and accommodation with it, but is also something special.
• The wedding brings its own expenses. So it shouldn’t get disproportionately expensive. You can also save money by going out for one evening rather than the whole weekend.
• It’s best to talk it through, and you know who in your circle of friends is a bit short of cash. Ask yourselves: can he or she afford this without trouble?

Tip: As a rule of thumb, budget €60 to €100, or less or more by agreement.

6. What will you do?

This is of course the crucial question: what are you actually going to do on the stag or hen do? And the options couldn’t be more different:

• Boozy: Should it be a trip to an exciting city, with plenty of drinks, drinking games, partying and a hangover?
• Spa: Or rather a spa weekend with beauty treatments and a relaxed manicure?
• Silly fun: It could also be bachelor party games, with funny and embarrassing tasks and plenty of cringe moments for the groom.
• Chilling: A trip to the cinema or a relaxed house party are popular with some groups.
• Culture: Why not visit a beautiful art gallery or a great museum, or even pick up a brush yourselves at a painting class?
• Remote cabin: The best friends in a cabin in the mountains, nicely secluded, cooking together and spending time in peace, view included!
• Action: Looking for a dare? No problem, bungee jumping, racing, paintball and the like are available almost everywhere!
• DIY: There are lots of DIY workshops, whether for jewellery, art or a pretty flower crown.
• Nature: A bike ride and a day at the lake, with a barbecue outdoors and plenty of fresh air!

The best way is to get inspired by our extensive list of activities and talk it over. You can plan one day or a whole weekend. Here are a few classics.

For women: hen do classics

Party & drinks

• Clubbing with a stretch limo
• Recording a CD or karaoke
• Wine tasting

Culture & beauty

• Dance class (pole, burlesque)
• City break with culture and sightseeing
• Styling and a group photo shoot

Chill-out programme

• Deluxe movie night
• Beauty and spa day
• Culinary tour and cooking class

For men: stag do classics

Strip & drinks

• City break with partying and a strip club
• Brewery tour / drinking games
• Red-light district & pub crawl

Action

• Paintball
• Go-karting
• A night at the casino

Adventure

• Day at the lake / camping
• Remote cabin & barbecue
• Hike / bike ride

Tip: Settle on two or three options, which you can then put to the group for a vote. These options can differ in price and should include a bad-weather alternative.

7. Agreements and finding a date

The rough framework is in place, and now it’s about agreements and pinning down the details.

• First, agree the possible dates with the most important people, so the best friend, brothers and sisters and so on. Then briefly ring all the invited guests (don’t just text). Give them a quick update on the plans and ask which dates work.
• Then set up a WhatsApp or Facebook group or similar. Invite all the guests and briefly state the facts (or put them to a vote).
  • When
  • Where
  • What
  • How much (costs)
• Put the activity options planned so far to a vote. Make sure you name a clear deadline for the decision. The option with the most votes is the one you plan further. If it’s a tie, the organisers have to decide…
• Short on time? Then simply inform everyone and skip the vote.
• Also ask for a confirmation, ideally in the form of a bank transfer, covering all fixed costs per person and the share for the groom or bride. After all, you have to make bookings. That costs money, and it’s only fair that the organisers aren’t left out of pocket. “I’ll bring the money on the day” isn’t ideal, because then he or she doesn’t turn up and there are problems later, as the organisers are stuck with the costs or have to chase people…
• The agreed date should now also be cleared with the partner. That way he or she can make sure nothing else gets planned, or better still: invent an excuse for what’s happening that weekend or evening (visiting friends, helping family move house or the like).

Tip: Agree options and the framework with the (most important) guests, ask for yeses and noes, and collect the money.

8. Booking activities, travel and accommodation (2 months before)

You have more or less planned the activities and collected everyone’s money, so now the final phase of planning begins: the bookings. How much planning this takes depends heavily on the place, of course.

• In your own town or city
  • Anyone who lives far away needs to book flights or trains.
  • Somewhere to stay or a place to sleep can often be found with friends, or in a guesthouse or hotel if you prefer.
• Another city
  • If you’re travelling from A to B with a big group, check trains or long-distance coaches. It’s cheap and a nice way to travel together. Don’t leave this step too long, or it gets unnecessarily expensive!
  • Look for good accommodation; Airbnb is a great place to start. Bear in mind, though, that bachelor parties usually aren’t very welcome there, just so you know. Alternatively, depending on budget, you can book a hostel with a group dorm, a guesthouse or a hotel.
  • Think of drop-outs or late joiners among the guests too. Is there a refund, or a spare place in an emergency?
• Getting around on the ground
  • You can hire a car (only if there are drivers fit to drive, of course).
  • Otherwise public transport and taxis are absolutely fine.
  • If you want to do it in style, you can go for a stretch limo!
• Restaurants
  • Do you have particular food wishes? Pick out a few restaurants that suit you. That could be a nice brewery, a restaurant with a buffet, one with a good wine list and a view, or a beer garden.
  • Get a table that’s big enough and reserve it.
• Booking activities
  • Reserve the activities. Actively ask for a discount when booking as a big group, or for a special bachelor party deal.
  • Also clarify what happens if the trip can’t go ahead as planned or fewer guests come.
• Planning the party
  • Simply stumbling wildly into bars and clubs isn’t recommended. The bouncer can wreck your plans.
  • So definitely reserve a table at the club, or at least ring beforehand and ask whether it’s OK to turn up with 15 women or men (and in fancy dress, if you’ve planned it).

Tip: Book your travel, accommodation, party and activities about 2 months in advance to be on the safe side. Check the cancellation terms.

9. Fine-tuning (2 weeks before)

Most things are in place, and now it’s about fine-tuning a few details.

• Fancy dress: When you plan a stag or hen do, you’ll read a lot about fancy dress.
  • Some want full costumes, others look for matching T-shirts or just an outfit for the bride or groom.
  • Accessories are popular too, such as sashes, crowns, sunglasses and the like. You can also skip them entirely. Talk it over and make a decision.
  • If you want fancy dress, order it at least 2 weeks in advance, and bear in mind that you won’t get in everywhere in costume, or that you should ask beforehand.
  • Bring a change of clothes too if you want to go out later or if the outfit could be a problem at the door or for an activity.
• Music: Make sure you have a good playlist.
  • You can play it while travelling, over a drink or in a limo.
  • The best thing is to put together a list on Spotify or similar and play it as needed. Include your favourite songs and those of the groom or bride.
• Games: When planning a stag or hen do, many people look for games, meaning tasks the groom or bride has to complete through the day or in the evening.
  • These range from small drinking games to embarrassing dares that involve passers-by.
  • Not everyone is a fan of these games, so simply talk it over and decide whether you want them. You’ll find plenty of inspiration on our site too.
• Photo book: To capture your memories, a photo book is a great idea.
  • Each guest can fill a double page: on one side a written message, a slogan or similar, and next to it a photo taken on the day of the party.
  • Ideally order a blank photo book and a few coloured pens 2 weeks in advance.

Tip: Organise a playlist and a photo book. Vote on fancy dress and bachelor party games and plan them, if wanted.

10. A smooth stag or hen do

The time has come: the organising is done and the day is here. So that it runs smoothly and the planning really pays off, here are a few final tips:

• Arrangements: You have everyone’s contact details, so ask all guests to be at a set place on time. Build in a bit of buffer so your schedule doesn’t slip.
• Kidnapping: Surprise the bride or groom at home and kidnap them! You can plan this nicely with the partner. But careful: not in a way that makes the neighbours call the police (for example if you’re wearing masks and carrying plastic guns or the like).
• Snacks: Organise a few snacks and drinks for the journey or as a welcome.
• Booking confirmations: Remember to take the booking confirmations and so on. Ideally not only in the email inbox on your phone, but printed out too, or at least shared between several people.
• Emergency kit: It’s no bad idea to have a power bank, some headache tablets, deodorant and umbrellas with you.
• Maps: If you want to be perfectly prepared, use a Google Maps map with pins for the places you’ll go and share it in the group.

11. Plan B: drop-outs and cancellations

Someone falls ill, a flight is cancelled or the weather ruins the outdoor plans. Factor that in from the start and it won’t throw you off on the day itself.

• Know the cancellation terms: For every booking (activities, travel, accommodation), ask until when you can cancel free of charge and what you get back if fewer guests come. Note the deadlines in one place all organisers can access.
• Bad-weather option: Have an indoor alternative up your sleeve for every outdoor activity (escape room, brewery, cooking class).
• Late joiners and drop-outs: Clarify beforehand whether someone can take over a free place at short notice and how you handle deposits already paid if someone does drop out.
• Postpone if you must: If half the group can’t make it, a good stag or hen do at a later date beats a half-empty one. Alternatively, a last-minute online party at least saves the mood.

12. Follow-up

The bachelor party was great and you have plenty of memories: Thomas is now a woman, Martin has a new tattoo and Astrid woke up in Sweden… 😀 That, or something like it, could be the verdict. Here are a few final tips for the follow-up:

• Costs: Put together a final breakdown of costs. Did someone pay for something, did one person cover all the taxis, or did a few guests not show up? The organisers should help here and spread the costs across everyone if needed.
• Photos: Collect the photos from the stag or hen do and share them with each other (the ones you want to share…).
• Photo book: Finish the photo book and ideally bring it to the wedding.

So, how did it go? Did our bachelor party checklist help with the planning? We’re glad to hear it. Feel free to leave us a few words, and all the best to you!